The Idiot Trio: Bad Bean Day
by Thatwolfbutler
Summary: In an Enchanted forest where animals looks like humans with animal features such as ears and tails, three wolves have a serious problem with a fox tricking one of them into buying two hundred cans of beans! Can the wolves get their money back to go buy groceries? Or are they out of luck?


**Heeellllloooo! I am glad to present to everyone another Idiot Trio production! This time in an enchanted forest! I will be revisiting this AU for sure! Now this is really more in the style of a cartoon xD Especially towards the middle and on. So I hope everyone enjoys this! I will update a small one shot for these guys every now and again, different AUs, different situations. Now! Go on and read and review and all that.**

 **Characters:  
Henry: Male!Hungary  
Gilbert: Prussia  
Alfred: America  
Feliks: Poland**

Deep in an enchanted forest filled with animals that resemble humans but with animal features, lived three wolves in a cave. It was a nice sized cave with a welcome mat and a mailbox for the mail.

It was nicely furbished on the inside as well. Sitting on the couch was Gilbert, the self proclaimed alpha of the pack. He was flipping through a magazine when his stomach started to growl. "Man I'm starving...Hey! Alfred! How about some lunch!"

Alfred was looking through the fridge in the kitchen and lowered his ears and whimpered. Their was a half can of soda, a bag of sugar, and for some reason a box of matches inside the fridge. No food... "Well...I would love to make us some lunch! But we're out of food!"

"What?!" Gilbert popped up. "How are we OUT of food?! Didn't you go grocery shopping?!"

"Well...I mean I sent Henry to go grocery shopping...and well he used all the money to buy cans of beams..." Alfred walked over to the cabinets and opened them. The insides were lined with cans and cans of beams. "Not even pork and beans...just regular beans..."

Gilbert rushed into the kitchen and opened all the cabinets. Beans! BEANS! Nothing but cans and cans of beans! His eye twitched a bit. "When were you going to tell me this?!" He glared at Alfred.

Alfred chuckled nervously. "Weeeeell...now seems like a good time...?" He tilted his head.

Gilbert ran his hand down his face. "Why...? Just...why?! Where is Henry?!" He growled, his tail swishing back and forth.

Henry opened the door to the cave and whistled, closing it behind him. "Hey guys! What's up?" He smiled and soon his ears lowered when Gilbert tackled him to the ground. Henry groaned and blinked a few times, shaking his head. "Uh...am I in trouble or something...?"

"Damn right you are! How could you spend all our grocery money on BEANS?! You could have at least gotten the pork kind! I'm a wolf! I NEED MEAT!" He shook Henry by the collar of his shirt.

Alfred sighs and rubs his head, watching his two pack mates and friends on the ground. He wasn't going to do anything unless he needed to.

"Well...this fox told me that if I gave him all my money he'd give me two hundred cans of beans! The best offer he's EVER given anyone ever!" Henry smiled.

Gilbert blinked a few times. "What?! A FOX told you this?! You know you're never suppose to trust those sleazy scumbags!"

"Well he seemed nice enough..." Henry pouted.

Gilbert grumbled and dragged his hand down his face. "Well...we need meat! But we don't have any money...so what are we gonna do...?"

Alfred rubbed his head. "Well...we COULD...you know...try hunting."

Henry blinks and shakes his head. "Hunting?! You mean...like hunting down other animals...?" He lowered his ears.

Gilbert's ears perked up and he stood up. "Haha! Alfred you, for once, have had a good idea! Hunting! Of course! Their are plenty of delicious animals out there!" He licked his lips.

"Guys...I don't think that's such a good idea..." Henry poked his fingers together.

Alfred laughs. "Come on Henry! We're WOLVES! We LIVE for hunting! Sure we've evolved to more sophisticated animals with a sense of super smart thinking! But that doesn't mean we can't hunt!" He puffs out his chest.

"Well yes, we ARE wolves, but isn't hunting down and killing other animals now illegal because we are a more sophisticated society unlike other animals?" He tilted his head

Alfred and Gilbert both blinked and hung their heads down low, forgetting about that. They were just really desperate is all.

"How about we try and raise MONEY so we can BUY some food. That sound good huh?" Henry suggested, looking between the two of them.

A light bulb appeared above Gilbert's head. "Or better yet...why don't we find that fox and TAKE BACK our money!" He laughs.

Alfred rubs his chin and nodded. "Yeah...YEAH! YEEEAAAHHH DUDE THAT'S A SMART IDEA! Foxes aren't really that strong or tough so I'm sure we could rough him up!"

Henry sighs. "Well...I guess...but it still feels a bit...wrong..."

Gilbert rolled his eyes. "Come on, he tricked you! Not to mention countless others! We're gonna teach him a lesson!"

"So Henry, lead the way!" Alfred smiles and wags his tail.

Henry sighs. "Alright...but I still say this is a bad idea...but come on."

So Henry showed the two where he met the fox who swindled him out of his money and into hundreds of cans of beans. He was located behind the local grocery store. He was sitting behind a crate, using it as a desk.

He had blonde hair that stopped above his shoulders, green eyes, and was currently filing his nails.

"Heeeeey, Feliks..." Henry rubs the back of his head and cleared his throat.

He smiles and throws his arms up. "Henry! My favorite wolf! What brings you here? Enjoying those beans?" He smiles.

Gilbert slammed his hand on the crate. "Nein! We AREN'T enjoying those beans! Now you give us back our money, or we'll have to show you just nasty wolves can be!" He growled.

Feliks blinks and sighs. "Look I don't give refunds, but if you're going to make threats, then you'll have to deal with my body guards." He smiles and snaps his fingers.

"Body guards? PFfft! I'm sure we can handle anything you've got!" Gilbert puffed out his chest.

Soon two shadows towered over the three wolves. They slowly looked back to be met with two giant squirrels. They had bushy tails and buck teeth, not to mention his squirrel ears. They were ten feet tall and big and strong looking, though their bellies seemed to poke out of their shirts a bit, their arms were a bit muscular. They were intimidating to say the least.

The three wolves gulped hard and looked as pale as ghosts as they looked up at the big mean squirrels. Maybe this was a mistake...

"These two are the squirrel brothers, Chippy and Ted. They are my personal body guards after helping them with a small nut problem they were having last winter."

"These guys bothern you boss man?" Chippy cracked his knuckles.

Ted nodded. "Need us to take care of 'em?"

"No no! We're uh...gonna...go now! And uh..." Henry laughs nervously. "Oh my god look at the time!" He checked his watch and made a run for it.

Alfred nodded. "Right! We're late! Laaaate...fooorrr...stuff...and..." He grabbed Gilbert and made a mad dash away.

Once far enough they panted and wiped their foreheads.

"How are we suppose to get our money back now?!" Henry gripped his hair.

Gilbert groaned and soon a light bulb popped up above his head. "I got an idea~! Kesesesese~!"

Alfred sighs. "This isn't going to be good...we're gonna get hurt aren't we?"

Henry nods. "I'm pretty sure we are..."

Gilbert pulled the two close and started to whisper the plan to each of them, cackling every so often.

While Feliks was counting his money, whistling a bit and sighing happily, his two body guards were standing a few feet in front of his area.

Henry and Alfred slid in front of them and smiled. They were wearing suites and ties and Henry was holding a briefcase.

"Heeeelllooo~! My name is Henry and this here is my associate, Alfred, we're here today to offer you something really, special!" He grins.

Chippy blinks and scratches his head. "Huh? Special...? Like what...?"

Alfred chuckles and grins. "Well! Something you two can't live without! Something so very special and important, you'll say 'whoa!'"

"Whoa!" They both said and looked at each other. They leaned in close as Henry held up the briefcase.

"Told ya~" Henry chuckles a bit and opens the briefcase, a purple mist blasts in their faces, making them blink and slowly fall asleep, falling forward and passing out on the ground.

Henry and Alfred grin at each other and high five.

Feliks puts the money he's made inside a metal box, locking it with a key he slid in his pocket.

Gilbert slammed his hand down on the crate and grinned, showing his sharp teeth and his tail was wagging. "Hello again Feliks~ Now are you gonna give me back our money or am I going to have to beat it out of you!" He growls and glares at him.

Feliks peeks over his shoulder to see Henry and Alfred grinning and waving whilst sitting on top of the two passed out squirrels. He gulped and laughs nervously.

"Like I would for sure love to give you back your money! But maybe I could interest you in something else?" He smiles and reaches into his pocket and pulls out a narrow silver whistle.

Gilbert blinks a few times. "Now what is that...?"

Feliks grins and takes a deep breath before blowing into, making all three wolves yell and cover their ears, whimper, and roll around on the ground.

Feliks laughs and grins. "This is a wolf whistle! A frequency that no wolf can stand! Now I suggest you run along now." He smirks at the three.

Gilbert slowly raises his arm up and grips the edge of the crate. "No...way! Now come here!" He gets up but yelps as Feliks blows the whistle once more.

Henry whimpers and shivers. "Well...it was a good plan...we just didn't see this coming..."

Alfred groaned and stuck one of his pinkies in his ear. "Yep...maybe next time..."

Gilbert groans, shaking his head. "I really hate that fox..."

Feliks whistles and both squirrels growled and towered over the three.

"They tricked up Ted..." Chippy cracked his knuckles.

Ted nodded. "That's not very nice of them Chippy..."

"Okay, little puppies go bye bye." Chippy picked the three of them up and crushed them into a ball. He nodded to Ted was holding a bat.

Chippy nodded and winds up the pitch and lets it fly. Ted swings his bat and hits it out of the park.

Feliks whistles at how far it went. "I say that's a home run!"

Inside of a crater far away, the three emerged, groaning and not in the best of shape.

Henry laughed and looked up, seeing birds flying around his head. "Hello pretty birdies~"

"Got any bright ideas Sherlock?" Alfred looked at Gilbert.

Gilbert groaned and grumbled under his breath. "No...you got any bright ideas...?"

Alfred grinned. "Well as a matter of fact I do~ Just follow me!" Now Alfred had a light bulb over his head.

In a hot air balloon, sailing over the forest were the wolves. Alfred finished tying a magnet to a rope.

"What's with the magnet?" Gilbert asked, crossing his arms and raising a brow.

"Well the box he keeps his money in is made out of metal, right?" He smiled, feeling really confident about his plan.

Gilbert nodded slowly. "Yeeaaaahhhh..."

Henry laughed and leaned over the edge a bit as he looked at how pretty the forest is from this high up! They were just above the tree line.

"Well when we get over to the store, and to the back where he's at, I lower the magnet, the box attaches to the magnet, then I lift it up and then we're off!" He grins.

Gilbert rubbed his chin and nodded. "You know what? That's actually a pretty good plan! Alright lets do it!" He cackles and grins.

When they are just at the right spot, Alfred lowers down the magnet on the rope and chuckles.

"You really think this is gonna work?" Henry tilted his head, lowering his ears a bit.

Alfred snorted. "Of course it is! Their is no down side to this plan!"

"But...won't they notice a magnet being lowered and a hot air balloon over them?" He scratched his head.

Alfred blinked and froze, paling a bit. "Oh...right..." He gulps and yells as a powerful tug took him overboard, but Gilbert and Henry quickly grabbed him, trying to keep him in, but were also taken out.

They all yelled and landed on the ground with a crash.

"That...was a pretty bad idea...good going Alfred..." Gilbert groaned.

Alfred whimpered. "My bad..."

Feliks sighs and shakes his head, them having landed in front of his crate desk. "You three never give up now don't you?" He snaps his fingers.

Chippy picked them up and crushed them into a ball once again. He pitch it to Ted who once again hit it out of the park.

They landed just inches away from their first crater.

This went on for awhile. Alfred and Gilbert having plans, each plan a bit stupider than the last and each time they got squished into a ball and hit in the same general area. They didn't get any closer to getting their money back anytime soon.

Henry crawled out of the crater and groaned. "You know what guys? I have a plan..."

Back in the cave, the three were bandaged up and each was eating beans from a can with a spoon.

Gilbert sighed heavily. "Looks like it's beans for the next few weeks..." He grumbled and stuffed his mouth with beams.

Alfred nodded. "Yep...great..."

Henry smiles and wags his tail. "I didn't know these beams were gonna be this good! Buck up guys! It could be worse!" Henry laughs.

The other two grumble and just eat their beans. Seems going home and eating beans was the best plan of the day.


End file.
